It’s Not About Access. It’s About Relationships

My first thought was, “hey, we’ve finally made it!”

This was immediately followed by, “wait a second, this isn’t what we are about…at all.”

Let me fill you in real quick.

Yesterday I received a dozen text messages from various friends around the country, all with the same screenshot.

It was from a very well-regarded private club that had updated their policy on “private club networks.”

Essentially it said that any member who was found to be hosting someone from one of these networks would be subject to “immediate dismissal.”

Wow, that feels harsh.

They went on to list half a dozen of these so-called private networks, including to my surprise, the Eighty Club.

I’ll refrain from reposting the screenshot or naming the club, as I don’t think that accomplishes anything besides gossip.

But in the 7 years our Club has been around, the one thing I’ve tried to make abundantly clear, especially in recent years, is that it’s not about access. It’s about relationships.

What is a Club?

To me, a club is a place where you can enrich your life through meaningful friendships and shared experiences.

While historically the concept of a club is exclusionary, that’s not how I experience most of the “clubs” I’m a part of.

My favorite part of being a member of a golf club is bringing people who aren’t members to experience it.

While my club is one of the more highly regarded in the area, I don’t know a single member who thinks it should be, or wants it to be, an insular fortress.

What does that accomplish?

Being a member of a place allows me to develop deeper relationships within our community. But it’s the guests that I’m fortunate enough to meet through other members who bring unique perspectives and expand my network

What Do Members Really Want?

First, I want to make it clear, I don’t think all so-called club networks the same.

The concept isn’t new. There are groups that that have been around for decades, but over the last 10 years, the internet has certainly contributed to more groups and more visibility.

Each of them has their own goals and personality.

A handful of them clearly have a pay-to-play model. Higher initiation fees and dues, and then they leverage their members for golf access, and charge a premium for those in the network who want to go play.

Personally, I’m not a fan of that. And this isn’t how the Eighty Club is run.

No one should be profiting off their club membership, and I can understand why many clubs would prohibit this.

Someone much smarter than I am once told me “Access should be an invitation, not a request.”

While I think there are some acceptable grey areas to this statement, I’ve learned in the world of golf, this is a good rule to live by.

Keeping that in mind, I’ve also learned that 98% of the private golf club members I’ve met enjoy showing off their course to people who will appreciate (and respect) it.

The more golf we all get to see and experience, the deeper our knowledge of the game becomes. More importantly, the more shared experiences, relationships, and memories we get to have.

I can’t speak to the other “club networks” that were mentioned, but the Eighty Club is about relationships first, and golf second.

If someone is clearly interested in joining our community solely for access, they’re not welcome.

You should care more about getting to know interesting and like-minded people than you do about playing an exclusive golf course.

But maybe I’m just naive, or simply not in the same demographic as the members of the most elite clubs.

A Changing of the Guard

Last year I took a trip to Australia and was fortunate enough to play Royal Melbourne, among a number of other courses.

For my round on the West, I was introduced to a member and paid the nominal guest fee.

Unfortunately, he was unavailable the next day to play the East course, but I arranged to play unaccompanied through the Club.

The round came out to $689 to play a single round of golf.

But I got to play. 

I was able to study a beautiful MacKenzie course steeped in history.

I’ve since said countless good things about Royal Melbourne and my experience there, all while providing them extra revenue.

Royal Melbourne is a private club but they provide limited options for non-members to be able to play the course, assuming they’re willing to pay.

This model is the norm outside of the United States, and I think more clubs here should adopt it.

We’ve seen golf societies pop up, in part, to help solve this problem.

If you belong to a golf club, you’re probably excited about experiencing other clubs and courses as well.

Communities like the Eighty Club help foster relationships that make these types of opportunities possible.

With the exception of the aforementioned “pay to play” groups, the modern golf society does nothing but benefit both clubs and members.

And honestly? What’s the difference between meeting someone in the Eighty Club versus a Bloomberg Terminal? Or an airport lounge? Or through your company’s Slack channel?

Yes, clubs should be mindful of the guests that are visiting. Banning members or networks from profiting off hosting golfers at the club is totally reasonable.

But dismissing members who share their home away from home with other people who will respect and appreciate it, simply because they met on the internet?

That approach feels misguided to me.

As for us, perhaps it’s on me to more clearly define what our community is and what it is not. I can’t speak for other communities, but for us, it’s about people. It’s about relationships. If you get to connect over a round at an interesting golf course, that’s just a bonus.